It’s not secret that I’m a bit of an internet junkie. What can I say? I love having so much access to knowledge, humor, social networking, and so on. I have so many bookmarks that I’ve had to create folders within folders within folders to organize them. And over the next few days I’m sharing some of my favorites from each category. Get your clicking finger ready! And here we go…

Family & Friends

Adam (these are pages bookmarked for Mr. Dork):

• http://www.freeworldgroup.com/ Lots and lots of free Flash games. Warning: You may find yourself wasting a lot of time on this site!

Mama Resources:

• http://www.kellymom.com/ My favorite breast feeding resource.
• http://promom.org/ Another great breast feeding site.

Sky Academy (learning at home resources):

• http://cp.c-ij.com/en/contents/2024/list_15_1.html Amazing paper crafts to print such as a scientific model of the sun!
• http://michellesjournalcorner.blogspot.com/2009/07/sound-bingo.html A fun audio version of the game Bingo.

Crafts:

• http://www.ohdeedoh.com/ohdeedoh/how-to/how-to-be-thankful-fall-garland-070293 A fun decoration to make for the Thanksgiving season. Be sure to browse the site for even more crafts and project inspiration!
• http://giverslog.com/?p=1146 A really easy, fun, DIY gift perfect for teachers, grandparents, or to keep for yourself!
• http://www.allfreecrafts.com/homemade-gifts/canning-jar-lamp.shtml A lamp I’ve been dying to make!

Shopping:

• http://www.theorganizedparent.com/servlet/StoreFront Products to help you be an organized mom.
• http://www.passionspice.com/ Nursing bras that are actually CUTE!

$$$:

• http://www.getrichslowly.org/blog/ A great personal finance blog.
• http://www.stretcher.com/index.cfm More money-saving tips than you’ll know what to do with!

Brain in a Binder (pages for my home management binder):

• http://www.diyplanner.com/ User submitted printables to use in your planner (such as a Franklin Covey planner).
• http://notebook.organizedhome.com/printable Binder-sized printable.

Bitchen’ Kitchen (recipes and more):

• http://www.motherearthnews.com/Real-Food/Artisan-Bread-In-Five-Minutes-A-Day.aspx Our favorite bread recipe (no-knead)!
• http://www.mothering.com/recipes/nori-wrapped-salmon We make this with tilapia because it’s cheaper. But we still love it!

Blogs

Groups:

• http://www.momblognetwork.com/welcome-new-user A network for Mommy bloggers.
• http://www.thesitsgirls.com/ One of my favorite blog networking sites.

Memes:

• http://fridayfillins.blogspot.com/ Fill in the blank prompts every Friday.
• http://www.wearethatfamily.com/2008/03/hi-yall.html Tips to make life easier.

Writing:

• http://www.problogger.net/ Probably one of the very best blogs about blogging on the internet. Don’t miss the “31 Days to a Better Blog” program!
• http://www.copyblogger.com/5-simple-ways-to-open-your-blog-post-with-a-bang/ Ideas for how to write the opening section of a blog post.

Design Tutorials/Tools:

• You can find some of my favorite blog design links in the post about my blog makeover.

More to come tomorrow!

What are some of your favorite websites? Leave me their urls in the comments!

What is one of the single most divisive parenting issues you can think of?

The World Health Organization (WHO) recommends infants be exclusively breastfed for the first 6 months of life and continue to be breastfed while being offered complementary foods to two years of age and beyond. But in 2003 in the US only 14.2% of 6 month olds were still being exclusively breastfed. Naturally lactivists cite these recommendations and statistics quite often in the quest to increase those numbers.

Imagine having this information, knowing all the amazing benefits of breastfeeding (for babies and mamas), and making plans to breastfeed only to have those plans completely fall apart. Now imagine trying to deal with the frustration and disappointment that would cause all the while wondering if other moms are criticising you behind your back for “giving up when the going got tough.”

I’m one of those lucky moms who have a relatively easy time breastfeeding. There were some horribly painful latch issues in the early days. But we worked through them and things are smooth sailing now. I’m also a big advocate of exclusive breastfeeding. But lately I’ve found myself frustrated by the way breastfeeding moms and formula feeding moms interact. It seems some nursing moms think the formula moms gave up too easily. They blame the moms for breastfeeding failure and harbor feelings of superiority. While some of the formula moms think the nursing moms are “breastfeeding Nazis” {an extremely offensive term}, or that they’re simply making too big a deal about the whole issue.

This has got to stop.

It’s my belief that most moms who don’t succeed in nursing their babes are not to blame. Are there moms who never even try, or who give up for really selfish reasons? Well, sure. There probably are. But there are also moms who don’t use car seats or who leave their babies in hot cars. That doesn’t mean they’re the norm. So if the moms aren’t to blame, who is?

Society.

What do I mean? Or, rather, who do I mean when I say society? I mean doctors, nurses, businesses, even lactation consultants! I mean everybody {yes you, and yes me}! See, here’s the thing. Breastfeeding is natural. But that doesn’t mean it comes naturally. It has to be learned. Moms (and sometimes babies) need help figuring out the mechanics of it as well as needing the right information and support.

I’ve discussed the factors leading to breastfeeding failure with a lot of moms. And I’m horrified by the accounts of doctors, nurses, and lactation consultants who dish out information that it just plain wrong, information that contributes to problems instead of solving them. How many of us mothers have been told we need to feed our babes for a certain amount of time on one breast then switch to the other? The nurses at the hospital tried to tell me to do that. Trying to follow their instructions nearly drove our family crazy. But I was lucky enough to read the right materials and learn otherwise. Babes should be given an opportunity to empty one side and get all the rich, fat hind milk. Then, if they’re still hungry, they should be given the other side. Babes who are limited in time on each side may not gain weight at the expected rate, leading moms and doctors to the false conclusion that mom’s milk isn’t rich enough which leads to the go-to advice to supplement with formula. Some hospitals and doctor’s offices even dispense formula samples to new moms when they’d be better served by a free copy of The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding.

But misinformation isn’t the only hurdle moms face, lack of support can be just as detrimental. There are two forms of support I think every mom needs, practical and emotional. Practical support comes from dads, family and friends. It can be anything from fetching a glass of water while mom is nursing to loaning out your best breastfeeding book to a new mom or sharing your favorite web resources. Emotional support comes largely from friends and family but really needs to come from everybody. Nursing moms, especially those who are struggling, need encouragement (even a thumbs up from a stranger can lift a mom’s spirits) and acceptance. In other words we need to stop bickering about whether moms should cover or not cover when in public and focus on supporting them now matter how they choose to breastfeed.

So why are we divided? I think part of it is that sometimes we lactivists (myself included) forget that breastfeeding moms face a lot of hurdles aside from the physical setbacks (such as inverted nipples, thrush, etc.). I’m here to ask that we keep that in mind and refrain from harsh judgements. But I might also ask moms who did not have success and switched to formula to keep in mind that when lactivists proclaim the benefits of nursing we aren’t trying to make you feel bad. We’re just trying to convince future moms to give breastfeeding a go, a goal I think we can all get behind. But as long as both sides view breastfeeding as an issue that divides us instead of an issue we can face together we will be too busy fighting in the mommy wars to ever make a positive change. Love certainly isn’t all we need to increase the number of breastfeeding successes but it’s certainly something we can’t do without.

As always, feel free to share how you feel in the comments!

Breastfeeding mums need this site:

kellymom

"This website was developed to provide evidence-based information on breastfeeding, sleep and parenting. I hope that my articles are helpful and encouraging. Thanks for visiting!"

I have navigated to this site time and time again when I had a question or concern about breastfeeding. I have shared the link with my breastfeeding friend on several occasions. And if you've never been there add it to your bookmarks right now.

That is all {a more substantive post to come later today}.

On our recent trip we spent a loooong time at the West Edmonton Mall (WEM). It was pretty awesome. We were there almost all day. Naturally Lucy wanted to eat on several occasions. And me, being the awesome parent that I am, did not starve my baby. I usually just find the nearest comfy spot to sit and nurse Lucy wherever that happens to be. And, when you're in a place as huge as the WEM and you have a hungry baby you don't really have time to track down and walk to whatever nursing area might be available. But, seeing as the WEM is so awesome I didn't want to leave without checking out their "Mother's Room." So, we went looking for it in anticipation of a feed. We found one (I think there were two total) tucked in a hallway off the main path. It was listed on our map, and there were signs. So it was pretty easy to find. Then (in case we really needed help finding it) there was this big mural on the wall:

I (being the highly critical art fan that I am) thought it was kind of an ugly mural, poorly done. But I give it an A for effort. And I was excited to see it. If this was how much attention they gave to the mere sign pointing the way to the Mother's Room I couldn't imagine what the room itself was going to be like. Grand...it had to be. Everything about the WEM was big and showy. And it was amazing! Amazingly BAD!

It was nothing more than a glorified bathroom, and a dirty one at that. That bench was the only seating available (except for the toilets). I'm sorry {no I'm not} but I am not feeding my baby in a public bathroom. They smell nasty. They're uncomfortable. I would never eat my lunch in one. And frankly, I find the idea insulting.

WEM: Let me show you how it's done. Behold, the Calgary Ikea nursing room:

And we've got happy moms and babies.

Maybe the WEM should have spent a little less effort on the mural and a little more on the actual room.

What is the nicest, or nastiest nursing area you've ever seen?