Guys, I’m sorry. I’m still adjusting to this whole “having a job thing.” I’ve been super busy. And I was totally going to blog and blog and blog this weekend…until the cold I’ve been battling won the war. I have been a snotty, miserable mess today. So here’s lots of pictures instead:

First up, a Halloween project inspired by eighteen25 {yeah, I know, October isn’t until next week, so what?}:

{most of these pictures were done by my boss at Madchen Studios}

  

<----A spooky photo because I wanted to play around with Adobe Lightroom {my new favorite program}. I think I went too big on this project. They kind of overwhelm my little Kijiji {like Craig’s List} table, hutch, thingy. But oh, well. Speaking of my little second-hand buffet thingamajig. I’m totally painting it one of these days. And it is going to be unbelievably awesome. Trust me.

Also, why is glitter so freakin’ expensive?

 

And now, more pictures from British Columbia {people pictured are me in my pajamas and Yeti hat, Lucy in her pyjamas, Uncle Jared, Uncle Spencer, and Adam – places pictured are Uncle Jared’s house/yard, the Natural Bridge in Yoho, and Emerald Lake in Yoho – PS: forgive the unusual watermarks…I’m tired, sick, and grouchy}:

                    {breastfeeding in the wilderness}

  {the view from Uncle Jared’s front door}

Some ooooold pictures from our trip to Ohio last year that I just now got around to editing/converting to jpegs:

{Yay Grandma!}

 

{Yay Great Grandpa!}

 

{Yay puppies and pools!}

And last but not least, more recent, random pictures:

{first day going to the day home}

 

{this guy let me get so close I was worried he was going to attack me}

 

So, there you have it. My blog has vomited pictures all over the internet. Thankfully my illness has involved zero of the same {colds suck, but they are far better than the flu}. Life is otherwise good, though I am stressing about all the things I need to get done. Lucy is adjusting well to going to the day home part time. School is in full swing for Adam and his med school applications for this cycle are almost complete. Uncle Spencer is our new neighbor. He just got a job at The Source. I am enjoying my new job. Aaaand…H&R Block tells us we should FINALLY be getting our tax refund from a few years ago. Supposedly we can expect a check around $3000 sometime soon. Phew. Thank goodness. We need it, especially since we’re traveling to Ohio for Christmas this year {a fact about which I am unbelievably excited}.

That’s all for now. I miss blogging more often and hope to get back into my regular schedule once I get caught up in other “real life” stuff.

I was blindsided last week.
Long story short I found my “dad.” And by “dad” I really mean “sperm donor” because, let’s be real, supplying genetic material does not a father make. My father is my step-dad. My bio-dad never paid child support, never visited me, never called, never wrote, not even a single birthday card. Ditto for all my paternal grandparents, uncles, and so on. But don’t think that keeps a little girl from wondering, and wishing, and hurting.
When I was a child I longed to find my dad.
When I was a teenager I longed to find my dad and give him a piece of my mind.
When I was a younger adult than now I longed to find him, give him a piece of my mind, and rake him over the coals for never having paid child support.
Then I found that I didn’t care…or, at least, I thought I didn’t care. After all, why on earth should I care about someone who cares not one iota for me? But that zen conclusion was the product of circumstance. I couldn’t find him. And that was that.
Until I “ran into” him on Facebook.
On Facebook.
And it turned my world upside down.
There he was. He was on Facebook, and MySpace too. There were pictures of him, surrounded by his collection of eleven electric guitars. Eleven guitars. Funny, he wasn’t around to help my mother pay for my one clarinet but he could buy himself eleven friggin’ guitars. And there he was, with a different child in his lap. He couldn’t be bothered to make the child that was me a part of his life, but apparently he had room in his life for others.
I freaked out. I was angry. I was sad. I yelled and cursed and cried. I bawled on the phone with my mother.  I vented to Adam. I tweeted about not knowing whether to contact him or not. I exhausted myself with the emotion of it all.
And then I made my decision.
They say you can’t pick your family {with the exception of your spouse}. Well, I’m lucky because, in this case, I can pick my family. I get to choose if this man will be a part of my life, a part of my family. Over two decades ago he chose to not make me part of his family.
And now I’m making the same choice.
There isn’t a good reason in the world to invite a person like that, a person who would desert his own daughter, into my family. There isn’t a good reason in the world I should put myself through the stress, and anxiety, and hurt I’ve been through any longer. And there isn’t a snowball’s chance in hell I’m giving him a chance to be a negative influence in my daughter’s life.
He walked out of my life over twenty years ago.
And I’m letting him go.
Forever.
Goodbye…asshole.

Hello!

Sooooo...I'm in Ohio.

Wait, what?!

Yeah, I'm totally in Ohio. I couldn't tell you beforehand because my mom reads my blog {hi, Mom!} and the trip was a birthday surprise for her. Lucy and I flew in on Tuesday and will fly back to Alberta on Wednesday. So there will be no Good News/Bad News this week. I didn't bring my laptop with me and I don't have access to the files I need. But I'll be back soon and I'll tell you all about my trip!

Carry on!