Don’t ever let anybody say Twitter is a waste of time.
Thanks to Twitter yours truly has a job interview on Wednesday. Hooray! I’ll tell you more about the  job if I get it. But I will say this…I really, really, really, really, really want this position. It’s pretty much perfect for me right now and I love the business for which I’d be working.
I had tweeted that I was starting my search for part-time work. I planned on submitting about a bajillion applications around town this week at the usual places…grocery stores, fast food joints, <insert menial labor position here>. Michael’s was my first choice, until I was offered the interview I have Wednesday. So I’ve got my fingers tightly crossed.
Aaaaand, just because I love it and am proud of how cheap I got it {$41 not including the cost of footwear}, here’s the outfit I’m wearing to my interview:

See, until yesterday I owned two pairs of pants {khakis and jeans}. I used to own a pair of work pants.
But then I got pregnant.
Bye-bye nice dress pants.
So now my closet pretty much consists of all casual clothes {t-shirts…lots and lots of t-shirts} that are either a: too small from before Lucy or b: too big from after Lucy. Not suitable for interviews. So I hit the mall. And it was a success if I do say so myself {and I do}. I was clueless and terrified to try and find something fashionable. I’ve been out of the style loop for several years now. But, wouldn’t you know it, clothing stores have people in them that know about clothes and will help you pull together an outfit! Apparently it’s like, their job or something. Who’d have guessed? I loved the gal that helped me out…and I loved her even more when she informed me during checkout that the pants I found were actually only $6! Score!
Anyhow, that’s that. Wish me luck!

I just got this message from someone I've never done business with, nor communicated with {that I'm aware of, maybe I know them on Twitter or maybe they comment on this blog}. If it is you, and you are reading this I have removed your name and website to protect your identity.

Hi Blogging Mommies and Friends!   My name is ******** and I am the owner of ***************. Some of you are familiar with our store, some of you have had giveaways or reviews, some have purchased from us and others have things for sale with us. I am a stay at home - homeschooling mom. I started this business three years ago wanting to help other moms stay home with their children. As you can probably understand in this economy we are struggling. We cannot compete with the big companies such as Walmart who bring items at cheap prices! That is why I am turning to you. I am a loyal reader of your blogs and know the power of a blogging mommy (and grandma)! :)  
We are a very small online business that supports other work at home moms. We carefully choose our items and only bring our customers quality items. Our items are often personalized, hand made and made to order. A unique gift!  
I am writing you today to ask for help (begging really). We are on the verge of losing our business. I would love to be able to stay afloat and keep some income coming in to the moms with items in our store. I am asking you to open your blogs and post about our store. A button to our store would be great as well. We do not have anything to offer for your advertising other than a huge heartfelt thank you from other mom's. I know many of you get paid for advertising. We need the help this season. If you could take a look at our items *********************, blog about some of your favorites and promote some hand (mom) made gifts that would be wonderful. If you are able to post about us please send me a link to your post. I would love to thank you personally. If you can pass this on to other blogging mom's that you know could help please do. I cannot express my gratitude in words.  
Thank you, Thank you, Thank you from the bottom of my heart. 

When that message arrived in my inbox I couldn't believe it. But I visited their website to check things out before I made my final judgment. And what I found on their website was not encouraging. I felt the items were overpriced {and not just compared to Walmart}. I can support WAHMs and homeschooling moms on Etsy without burning a hole in my wallet. I don’t spend money at businesses just because they’re mom-owned. I spend money at businesses because they deserve it.
Please explain to me why I should give away one of the only products I have {just because it's digital doesn't mean it has no value} to save someone else’s business? Why should someone get for free what my other sponsors pay me for because they couldn’t keep their business afloat? If one’s business can't make it without me saving it maybe they ought to change what they’re doing. And maybe I'm just heartless but if I gave free advertising space to every WAHM who wasn't making money I would never make money either. It is not my job to make sure every one else stays employed. And while the government might give out bailouts to industries that are "too big to fail" and that employ probably hundreds of thousands of people I am NOT the government and this business is NOT an entire industry. They say 50% of small businesses fail in the first year and 90% in the first five. Is it my responsibility to prevent that from happening by giving away what my business provides?
I find it rude and ridiculous to send me an unsolicited request for free advertising, especially when not offering anything in return. It's pretty common for bloggers to contact companies to set up reviews/giveaway {though in most cases businesses contact us} but we're providing a service in exchange for those samples. Offer a discount code for me to share or a gift card to host a giveaway for my readers. It would have provided publicity and traffic to the web store while giving me the opportunity to give my readers something worthwhile. 
See, I try to limit reviews/giveaways on my blog for a reason. I want my audience to have good content. I don't want to be a corporate swag sell out. I haven't yet done a review that didn't come with free stuff for my readers too {and I’m hoping to keep it that way} nor have I written up a business or product I don’t personally like. 
But all that aside I DESERVE TO BE PAID FOR MY WORK. My work is blogging. I have worked very, very hard to make a good looking site and I work hard to post regularly and with interesting content {something that has suffered a bit during our move and the holidays but I digress...}. And here's what I think offends me so much: by asking me to not get paid for MY work so I can make sure she can continue to get paid for HER work, she has essentially said that HER work is more important/legitimate than mine.
I wouldn’t send an e-mail to a business saying “Could you send me some free shoes for my kid? I’m a SAHM! I can’t pay you but I’ll send you a big ‘thank you’!” So why is it OK to come to me and say “Could you spend your time writing up free publicity or give me free advertising? I’m a SAHM! I’ll send you a big thank you!” This woman says she started this business because she wanted to help moms stay home with their kids. Well, what about me?
Blogging is work too. My blog is not just some digital scrapbook/diary to keep my family up-to-date. It is a product into which I put a freakin' LOT of effort. And if you are really a "loyal reader" like you say then you should know that. If you were a "loyal reader" you should know better than to try to manipulate me into giving away my work with a sob story and compliments that, frankly, feel less than sincere. You have offered nothing, not even publicity {though, even then, I’ve seen some compelling arguments against bloggers writing unpaid in exchange for publicity}. You, a complete stranger to me, want me to save your business in exchange for nothing. No discounts for my readers, no giveaway, no publicity, nothing. And by doing so you are essentially telling me my work is worth nothing.
Well I disagree. I think my work is worth something. That’s why I charge for advertising space {with the exception of non-profits}.  Maybe some people think that because I don’t make much {and believe me, I really, really, really don’t} then I won’t care if I go from making pennies to making nothing. I do care. Any professional blogger {or blogger with delusions of professionalism like myself} should care. So will I give away the one source of income I have on this blog to save your failing business?
NO.

Bio Blurb and Blog Summary: Sarah lives in the mid-west with her husband of four-and-a-half-years and their five-month old baby girl Lucia (Loo-sha) Chamberlin. She has spent the past five months home with her daughter and in one week will return to work as an American Literature teacher to high school juniors. She has been blogging since 2005, but with the introduction of motherhood also came the mommy blog transformation. Joyfullygray captures snipits of everyday life with her family.

Ready or not: Working Mommy it is

In the beginning the days were of sweat pants, breast pads, chills, nursing, more nursing and of shock that the conclusion of my birth story had been written. Yes, just like that, the chapter of my first pregnancy closed. My pregnancy, like the build up to Christmas morning, was gone in a flash. Excitement abound! And then it was over.
In the beginning there were some raging hormones, some baby blues, some highs and lows, some tears and joy. And more chills. Brrr! I was freezing during those early days, and the milk spilling from my chest, while briefly tepid, quickly turned sub-zero, only to make matters far wintrier.

In the beginning there was a constant reality check: my baby was out of my body—my body where she had been safely tucked for the last 41 weeks. Now she was on the outside. On the outside where I had to keep her safe, where I was responsible for her well being, where any diaper rash was a reflection of my poor mothering skills and where scabs on my bleeding nipples and bright red stretch marks were my badge of honor.

In the beginning there was finally a sense of calm, of amazement, shear awe, even bliss. Oh yeah, and that one thing: True Love.

This true love that I encountered brought on occasional thoughts of maternity leave: that it would someday end, that I would someday return to my teaching gig. Admittedly, there were some break downs. Oh yes! Blubbering-cry-like-a-sobbing-lunatic-break-downs.
Breakdowns where I would call my [then] pregnant best friend and scare her to death, making her swear to her husband that she would not be a post-pregnancy mess like me.
And there were more breakdowns where I would call my mother and sob, making her promise me that it would be okay, that everything would be okay.
And more breakdowns where I would make my husband feel like absolute shit because I could not quite yet be a stay at home mom. Where I would make him feel guilt and sorrow about something he could not control. And it was unfair, unfair because he is a good man, a good provider, a smart, hard-working, will-bust-my-ass-for-this-family-kind-of-man.
And one day it ended. It had to end. Self-pity and loathing is no way to live. It was no way to experience life with my new child. The people around me just weren't having it anymore. My mother put her foot down, told me to stop fretting over the future and start enjoying the now.

Enjoying the now, what a novel idea.
And then I put on my big-girl pants and sucked it the hell up.
Thoughts of maternity leave left my brain. I was just living life—an oath to live day by day, enjoying the now, with my little bundle of joy.

The days were of long naps, gazing into each others' eyes, talking and sharing, learning about each other. Good days, full days, the best days—the best days of my life.

That was March—that was March, April, May, June, and July.

March made August feel like a century away.
At least five months away. And that was supposed to be enough time.
But now, as I write, it is August—August and 14 days away from going back to work. And guess what? It was not enough time. But it was our time, our gift that I am ever-so-grateful to have been given.
And, as we mothers know, all sidewalks end, all chapters close and new ones begin.

And so mine is.

After five-months of maternity leave, again, I will be putting on my big girl pants. I will be sucking it up and heading back—back to work. And I consider myself one of the lucky ones—one of the lucky mothers to have had five whole months. No, no more will I have entire days, entire twenty-four hour periods with my child, but I will take what I can get, I will be grateful and I will make every second count.
Lucia and I have had many talks about the impending change. I've told her, with tears rolling down my cheeks, about the things we will be doing differently. I’ve promised her that we will still nap and nurse, still cuddle and giggle—we will make time for our favorite things. I've explained to her that it has to happen because it is what works best for our family financially, it is what helps give her her daily breast milk, it is what helps put money away for her college education, future piano lessons, ballet classes, or whatever her flavor may be. It is what is—and sometimes what is might be a hard pill to swallow.

I tell her these things and she giggles and coos at me, somehow letting me know that she will be all right—somehow telling me that it is me that will hurt and ache inside.
But remember, I am sucking it up. I am putting on my big girl pants and I will rise to the occasion. I will because, like my mother says, I always do.
It helps that my husband is so supportive. He knows what a difficult task lays in front of me. He knows and he cares. He has also told me that I am different now—that I am stronger since pregnancy and child birth, that he knows I can do anything.
He is right.
I am a strong mommy. And I am about to be a strong working mommy. Fortunately for me, I do not work the typical eight to five; and, I have the cushion of autumn, winter, spring and summer breaks. I can enjoy the best of both worlds: work long enough that I yearn to stay at home with my daughter, and be home long enough that I need to get out a bit. Lucia too will have the best of both worlds: some socialization with other young children and lots of mommy time as well.
I plan to continue breastfeeding when I return to the grind. The pump and I are not yet too great of friends, but we are working on our relationship. I try to spend time with her once a day, providing bottles of thick goodness for daddy to give Lucia from time to time. I’ll admit, it has been difficult working the pump into my full-time nursing schedule, but I've felt the need to stock-pile my milk. I know when I am away from baby, pumping will be more of a necessity, so I am hoping my relationship with the good old Medela will flourish. I am sure it will, because just like myself, my boobs will too rise to the occasion.
I’ve also come to realize that with my return to work, the house may not always be perfect, which is something my OCD self will have to face. Saturdays will not be entirely dedicated to cleaning because it will not be the most important thing. Full days at home with Lucia will be a luxury and thou shall not waste. Organization will be of the essence, the completion of small-tasks a miracle. And, then, fortunately for our household, my husband has been doing our laundry since day one, so there will always be clean skivvies and fresh towels. He also likes to cook, lucky us! We will be a unit. Our chores completed with a tag-team effort. I take on the toilet; he’ll take on the dog hair. Scratch that. We will go for a walk with our family, venture to the park or read a story together. Because life won't wait, it will fly by like these months already have. We will rise to the occasion and meet life face to face! Forgo the scrubbing mandates!
Another something that has helped ease my aching working mommy heart is that I found a wonderful caregiver. I interviewed many home daycare providers and visited many centers as well. Nothing floated my boat. Until one day, I saw her, I met the children she cared for, I watched her work all morning, and I knew—I just knew she was the one. It was that gut feeling, my maternal instinct rising to the occasion.
Learning the ropes of being a working mom will not be easy, but at this time it is necessary. And we, my family and I, will make it work—we will rise to the occasion.

Stay tuned.